Family Leadership Strategies

29 Unsurprisingly, the issues faced by siblings and cousins are often matters of fairness, communication, and trust. If poor communication, rivalries, or grudges exist between siblings and cousins, they tend to become amplified during the process of preparing and selecting new leadership. For this reason, progress on family leadership transition may require members to ‘clear the air’ and reset relationships. Some muddle through this process with mixed results, or ignore it altogether. Others engage a third–party consultant whose aim is to establish family communication in a form that is clear, sincere, and provides a basis to address and remedy conflict. Avoiding difficult conversations rarely puts a family on the path toward growth and harmony. How then might a family approach the complexities of sibling and cousin dynamics? We know from experience that one framework does not fit all circumstances, however from a process standpoint we can make some general observations. Effective leadership transition strategies recognize that seniors’ positive outlook and personal behavior are the most powerful influences on sibling/cousin interactions. They set the tone for the family and define what desirable behavior is. That said, seniors must be consistent in their behavior. What is said pales in comparison to actual behavior. If seniors talk of family harmony but undermine it through self-dealing, disruptive actions, the next generation will recognize it as insincere and cynical. When parents, grandparents, aunts, and uncles are engaged in respectful discourse and effective decision-making, the next generation will often emulate such behavior. Where outliers or disruptive behavior exist, it is the responsibility of seniors to call attention to the behavior. Similarly, positive and constructive behavior by the next generation should be openly acknowledged. The stronger the boundaries and expectations for proper behavior within a family, the more easily problems can be dealt with early. As such, families are advised to openly discuss expectations for siblings and cousins early and often. Perpetuating poor communication, decision-making, and unhealthy family dynamics is not a strategy for future success. Creating a climate of open communication is a key responsibility of seniors. Seniors should take the lead by broaching the issue of long-term succession, demonstrating openness and good listening behavior. Forums for communication that are comfortable for the family should be explored. Special considerations